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4 Days Left!

As D-Day approaches, I must say that I am not without any nervousness, to be honest. I am happy and excited about this change that I am undertaking but I can't help the little flutters of butterflies in my stomach in certain times of the day.

Last night I had bought a magazine to sort of inspire me to remain excited about the change. Unfortunately, the magazine did not succeed to whet my curiosity or my inspiration. I'm sure their initial intention was to show that women can be confident and also prove that their creativity is not hampered or even blocked, which is a wonderful empowering idea. I mean look at Instagram, YouTube and social medias. Some trends are so Avant Garde that it's crazily fabulous! But to me the contents of the magazine made me feel quite intimidated by how loud and boisterous it was. I got scared shitless!

I think as an individual I have learned to understand how I could remain positive and excited about something good and it's not necessarily through over-the-top representation of the change. Rather, I prefer to rely on the nerd in me to keep myself informed and satisfy my curiosity not only visually but also narratively. My feelings about the magazine was that its representation borders on superficiality, over enthusiastic and over zealous sense that is quite close to the brink of straying away from the initial reason of making the change in the first place.

Astaghfirullah... I may be bearing this sin for saying this or even commenting on this but without wanting to be a bigot I still believe in "to each their own". I'm just praying that I stay true to myself for Allah's sake....

I appreciate the effort because it takes a lot of guts for such publication to show the world a different perspective rather than the stereotype. But I would personally not purchase that magazine again for a while. And I'm not saying this to deter others from doing it either. In fact the magazine shall remain anonymous in this blog. It is just a personal preference and opinion. I have no qualms for any ladies to purchase it. In fact I think it's good to keep up with trends but for me, I just prefer inputs from which I could not only gain inspiration from but also learn. So I'll just stick to YouTube, blogs, articles and Instagram.

I'll continue praying for the strength to go for it. It's a massive commitment which I really do not want to give up on. Insyaallah...


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