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Okay, this is what I'm going through in the sleep department. I go to bed super duper tired; fall asleep for a little while; and then wake up and toss and turn for HOURS; drift off to sleep in the last few moments before my alarm clock rings; wake up super duper super TIRED.

So where does it leave me? Stoned. Most of the day and trying to put on a brave front as if I'm all alert and conscious especially when I have to work.

It's been going on like this since a few weeks back I think. I can't really remember when this pattern started but I do know that I have a problem "switching off". When I have things on my mind or if I happen to be hyper or very, very tired, my brain goes on OVERDRIVE and I would be thinking of anything and everything. Thing is, I have no idea what's going on in my mind these days. They're incoherent thoughts. Ideas that float in at that last moment before slumber and it will drift back louder than ever in the middle of my REM cycle.

There was one night when I actually tossed and turned SO much that I got up, changed into a different pyjama and then climb back to bed just to sleep better.


Hence, 2 nights ago I tried this; I was given muscle relaxant a month ago for my muscle cramps. So I took that and a flu pill in hopes that it would lull me sleep long enough without waking up in the middle of the night for no particular reason. It sort of worked but I could literally FEEL my mind working against the pills. My whole body was in atrophy coz the muscles are forced to relaxed, but my mind was WILLING my body so much to move and fidget. I remember thinking, "the meds must be working or I wouldn't feel this way". I don't know how to describe it. It's like I'm awake but I'm also not.

After a while, I forget that I was "fighting" my body with my mind and went to sleep waking up the next time to the sound of the alarm telling me to have my 'sahor' and then again when it was time to get up for work. The end result, I get to sleep in longer successions without waking up so often in the middle of the night. Sure I am sleepier when I wake up because the meds were still working, but to have a better sleeping pattern is more than I could ask for.


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